Category Archives: Verse

Girl from Nantucket looks forward to end of National Poetry Month

A Nantucket Island woman is speaking out today in an attempt to raise awareness about a little known negative of National Poetry Month.

“Thank god it’s almost over,” said Regina Fouquet of Madaket, a village at the western end of the popular tourist destination.

Fouquet, 34, says she has been subjected to rhyming harassment every year since the Academy of American Poets started the annual celebration in 1996.

“Starting April Fool’s Day every Tom, Dick, and Whitman thinks they’re a poet,” said Fouquet, “but they’re idiots, so of course the only form they know about is the dirty limerick. ‘Dah-dah dah dah-dah from Nantucket, dah-dah dah dah rhymes with Nantucket’.”

“Soon, people start sending postcards and calling or emailing all hours of the day and night with their stupid limericks,” she said.

“I don’t find anything remotely funny about the names Regina and Fouquet, or that I’m from Nantucket,” added Fouquet.

And she wants amateur poets to know, “it’s pronounced Re-jeena Foo-kay.”

But what rankles Fouquet most of all is being referred to as a girl: “I’m a woman, not a girl — it says so on my NOW membership card.” This year she prepared for National Poetry Month by retaining legal counsel, and is already preparing papers for harassment suits against more than 100 limericists in nine countries.

“Call me a girl again, and you’ll be hearing from my new attorney — Gloria Allred. She’ll kick your ass all the way to Limerick,” Fouquet said.

Condi Goes for the Gold

I’m off to see the winner,
And hoping he’ll make me his veep.
My job at State’s a miserable flop,
But this sistah’ will ensure a sweep!
A sweep’s a lock, and then I’m told…
I’ll be the prez, John cannot hold…
And cause, because because because, because…
McCain will die! He’s really old!
I’m off to see the winner,
And hoping he’ll make me his VEEEEPPP!

(An update to a little prediction I made on Blognonymous two years ago.)