Iraq not speaking to Bush – Uncertain future after Bush forgets 5th anniversary

Baghdad is quiet but tense Thursday morning, one day after President Bush forgot his and Iraq’s fifth anniversary.

“He claimed he wanted to do something spontaneous and romantic, but give me a break,” said Iraq. “Showing up late with Cheney and McCain so they can watch spring training baseball isn’t spontaneous, it’s insensitive,” Iraq said.

“As for romantic, he obviously has no idea what romantic is.” Iraq is refusing to speak to Bush “until he shows he’s sorry for what he did.”

Last night Bush initially claimed he had merely tried to plan an informal celebration. “The only reason Cheney and McCain were there was to deliver the giant submarine sandwich,” Bush told Reuters. “I guess Iraq wanted me to do something more conventional.”

But this morning Bush admitted in a radio interview that he had let the anniversary slip his mind.

“I am so busted,” Bush told The Adam Carolla Show. Carolla convinced Bush to send Iraq flowers, and suggested a website offering discount bouquet shipments if the promotional code ADAM is used.

However, Iraq was not mollified. “We all know what’s going on here,” Iraq said. “What’s going on here is that he’d rather be with someone else. Pakistan and Syria have been texting me that they’ve seen Bush at the clubs with Afghanistan and Iran.”

“If he wants this relationship to work, Bush needs to stop getting preoccupied with other things, and get back to occupying me,” Iraq said.

6 thoughts on “Iraq not speaking to Bush – Uncertain future after Bush forgets 5th anniversary”

  1. I am loathe to speculate on what this means for Iraq’s increasingly open flirtation with Iran. Could it be that Iraq actually plays for the other team?

  2. Carolla convinced Bush to send Iraq flowers…

    Oh no! Not nearly enough… Bush is gonna have to produce the bling now! And what with the price of gold where it is, that ain’t gonna come cheap.

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