iNews Friday – 3/28/2008

From the iNews 9000 Turbo Wi-Fi Headline Translator–

Headline: President Bush hugs a person dressed as the Easter bunny at the start of the annual Easter Egg Roll, overlooking the South Lawn of the White House. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)
Translation: Invisible no more – Bush stands by Harvey, won’t dismiss transgender bunny from Cabinet
Headline: City told to close high-tech toilets – Andy Rogers / P-I
Translation: *The toilet encountered a problem and needed to close. Please tell Microsoft about this problem…*

Headline: US Mistakenly Ships Arms Parts to Taiwan
Translation: “Why didn’t I think of that excuse?” exclaims Ollie North

Headline: Mumia deserves new hearing
Translation: All together: “Free Mumia while supplies last”

Headline: Hillary takes her message to Fox News
Translation: “Look into my eyes, Fox Nation, and surrender to my will! Be my willing thralls!”

Headline: Woman claims airport security forced her to remove nipple ring with pliers
Translation: Gloria Allred mentally calculates her billable hours as woman demonstrates most popular feature of the TSA employee benefits package

2 thoughts on “iNews Friday – 3/28/2008”

  1. President Bush hugs a person dressed as the Easter bunny – Queerty first to break story about Prez’s new trans-species relationship. Bush defense: “What? I thought it was Laura!”

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