Bush in Romania – Plans to visit Coliseum, Vatican

President Bush arrived in Romania today for the NATO summit, continuing the important business of conducting foreign policy.

“It’s good to be in Rome,” Bush said.

“I’ve been looking forward to this trip my whole presidency,” said the clearly excited president. “We’re planning to do the tourist thing, be turisticos. Want to see the Vatican and St. Peter’s. Hope the Pope — hey that rhymes — hope John-Paul can fit us into his schedule.”

“I also want to see a soccer match at the Coliseum, and then take Laura for a romantic cruise on the Grand Canal,” the president said.

But Bush noted that serious diplomacy was the primary reason for the trip. “We’ve got more countries wanting to join NATO, and I don’t like it one bit,” he said, singling out Georgia’s application for membership.

“We can’t let our Peach State join NATO. As much as I would like the Confederacy to be a part of NATO, it makes it look like America is not fully behind my foreign policy, and I can’t not have America at my behind, fully,” said Bush.

Bush had a message for Georgia. “I have a message for the politicians in Atlanta: NATO is for foreign countries. That means countries that are foreign, which means they are foreigners. Meaning not domestic. They speak foreign languages, French, German, Russian, British,” Bush said.

In other news, the White House denied Bush was booed when he threw out the opening day first pitch at yesterday’s Washington Nationals game. “They were yelling ‘Buuuuuuush, Buuuuuuush’,” press secretary Dana Perino said.

7 thoughts on “Bush in Romania – Plans to visit Coliseum, Vatican”

  1. “…and I can’t not have America at my behind, fully,” said Bush.

    Because you never know what America might not, not be doin’ back there. ;-)

  2. This just in — President Bush had this to say about his trip so far:

    “Why did I come here? To quote the B-52s, ‘Rome if you want to, Rome around the world.’ I thank the Romaniac peoples for their warm welcome. In your language, ‘mille vanilli grazie’.”

  3. I didn’t know that Mademoiselle Perino had turned into Hans Moleman.

    “Are you saying ‘booo’ or ‘Booourns’?”
    “BOOOOO!”
    “I was saying Booourns.”

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