John McCain today explained his recent statement that the U.S. economy has “had a pretty good, prosperous time” during the eight years of the Bush Administration.
“The mortgage crisis, the ballooning debt, the recession, the falling dollar — these just don’t matter,” the presumptive Republican nominee for president told a group of California supporters, the National Association of Fine T and A (NAFTA), a group of professional women based in the San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles.
McCain said his view of the economy is the result of a new statistical measure he has personally created. McCain said his measurement, the Gross McCain Product, is more accurate and simpler to understand and compute.
Writing on a whiteboard, McCain explained the Gross McCain Product as a ratio of his personal annual income to the net worth of his wife, beer distributor heiress Cindy McCain.
“The McCain made $339,000 last year, while my wife’s share of the family business, plus all her stuff, is currently worth $100 million. That’s a GMP of 3.4 to 1000. Why, just last year The McCain’s household servants made $400,000, out my own pocket. Cindy’s pocket. Our pocket,” explained McCain.
“This is a huge improvement, my friends. Back when The McCain had the starter wife, she dragged down the economy with a GMP of 2 to 0-point-3. All she had to her name was that 1974 Maverick.”
“My friends, you shouldn’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure out how well we’re doing,” said McCain. “That is the GMP. Straightforward, straight-talk on the most important aspect of the economy, the only part that matters to The McCain. And that is the McCain sector,” he said.
“This is how The McCain rolls on economic statistics,” he told the enthusiastic NAFTA audience.