President admits economy “in shrinkage” – “Normally much bigger than this,” Bush says

President Bush, in a televised press conference today, again stopped short of saying the U.S. is in a recession. However, he did go so far as to say he thinks the economy is “in shrinkage.”

Bush laid the blame for the shrinkage on Congressional Democrats, whom he said had immersed the economy in ice-cold water due to their failure to act on high prices for gasoline, food and wedding presents.

Bush described his personal sense of embarrassment at the recent North America trade meeting in New Orleans. The president recounted how Mexican President Felipe Calderon and Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper commented to him that the U.S. economy’s growth seemed unusually small, in comparison with its size during the Clinton administration.

“I felt like they caught me with my pants down,” Bush said.

“I had to keep saying, ‘it’s normally much bigger than this,’ but they couldn’t take their eyes off my small quarterly growth.”

The president went on to say swag projections for the wedding of his daughter, Jenna, need to be revised downward due to limp consumer confidence.

Bush said that the economy would spring back to its full size if Democrats were to authorize oil exploration in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. “Drilling in ANWR would perk up the economy. Lots of deep drilling,” he said.

4 thoughts on “President admits economy “in shrinkage” – “Normally much bigger than this,” Bush says”

  1. i know wee Aussies tend to be a tad ignorant at times; but shrinkage in the springtime? Sounds like the economy needs a major dose of that infamous patent medicine.

  2. …in comparison with its size during the Clinton administration.

    Well the facts speak for themselves. During the Clinton years our “growth” was experiencing expansion on a regular basis.

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