iNews Friday – Michele Bachmann Tribute Edition, 5/1/2009

From the iNews 9000 wi-fi headline translator—

Headline: Carona gets 66 months in federal prison
Translation: Will share cell with lime wedge

Headline: Michelle Bachmann’s Logic – CO2 Is Natural, Therefore Harmless
Translation: Bachmann to demonstrate CO2 is safe – Will live in airtight box for several days

Headline: ‘Swine’ flu name — offensive to Jews, Muslims?
Translation: Searle narrows choice of vaccine names to Kosherenza and Halal-rex

Headline: Obama’s 100 days of foreign affairs
Translation: Bill Clinton to reminisce about his foreign affairs on “Larry King Live”

Headline: Obama Orders Review of $329000 Air Force Flight Over New York
Translation: Air Force to cut costs – may merge with Delta

Headline: Fox to air ‘Lie to Me’ instead of Obama news conference
Translation: Lightman and team have their easiest case yet. Special Guest Star Michele Bachmann.

Headline: Oregon man accused of impersonating doctor, charged
Translation: Pharmacist notices “doctor’s” prescriptions written legibly, alerts police

Headline: On First Day as Democrat, Specter (Again) Bucks His Party
Translation: Specter gets the hang of the “not a member of an organized party” thing

Headline: Bachmann falsely stated ACORN faces criminal charges
Translation: Bachmann stuffs face with acorns in hilarious Nazi squirrel impression

Headline: Airlines upset with Biden’s suggestion to avoid air travel because of flu
Translation: Chrysler will retool to mass produce Biden clarifications

2 thoughts on “iNews Friday – Michele Bachmann Tribute Edition, 5/1/2009”

  1. That stunt with Air Force One was the height of stupidity. Obama’s going to have to give up his jet if he isn’t careful, look what happened to the auto execs and they didn’t even buzz a major city.

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