“Holey Pants Batman!

OK… I get it. Everybody want’s to try and squeeze a little more cash from consumers, especially when we’ve started behaving like Jack Benny in bankruptcy. But is it too much to ask that a pair of jeans last more than a year? If fact, I do remember a time when GAP jeans (the brand I usually buy) didn’t self-destruct roughly 12 months after purchase.

No longer… Not only has almost every pair of GAP jeans that the Frogette and I have bought in the last 2 years developed holes, the holes are showing up in a suspiciously similar, overtly embarrassing, place.

Now I could understand if the jeans from one particular batch—which for GAP means a batch from one particular manufacturer, one particular country—all turned out to be worthless. But different batches? Over two years? All developing holes in the crotch just below the zipper seam?!

5 pairs so far, 3 of mine and two of the Frogette’s. What the f*ck?!

11 thoughts on ““Holey Pants Batman!”

  1. Dude (y Dudette!) Not only from different batches, but I’ve had the same issue on both a pair of Levis And of Lees.


    What gives, indeed?!

    If such a “conspiracy” is indeed in place then the malefactors needs must include the manufactures of the machines which weave the denim, as well as the producers, though I’d imagine the stitchers could very well be ignorant on all points. How else could such occur across brands?

    Howdy! and hope all’s (otherwise) well with y’all, btw. :)

  2. That’s really weird. I guess it must be the denim, as MB says. I haven’t had that happen. Mr. Yenta hasn’t either. Of course we live on the other side of the country and might be getting our third world imports from entirely different places than you do out there. I wonder if LL Bean’s jeans hold up better. I’ve never seen an item from LL Bean die a natural death. I’ve had to take out contracts on Bean flannel shirts I was sick of.

  3. MB – I think the porn industry is definitely involved here. They’re always at the forefront of technology (i.e. Blu-Ray, long wearing lipstick). Perhaps they’ve invented a crotch hole inducing laser.

  4. Micheal! Long time no hear.

    I’m tempted to just keep on wearing them. Do you remember those patches that our mothers used to put on jeans? Where can I get some of those?

    Zenyenta… Yeah I’ve got some stuff from Structure (long since out of business) that are at least 15 years old. Again…only for around the house wear. Though to your point about ‘other side of the country’, though… I think Michael is in the midwest, Cleveland if I’m not mistaken. So the problem goes at least as far across as Ohio. ;-)

  5. Mr_Blog… Oh maybe for me, but how do you explain the Frogette?

    Frogette… I don’t think so. I mean…if it were the porn industry, wouldn’t they develop ‘exploding seams’? You know, and advance of velcro rip-away clothing.

  6. I’d blame it on the genetically modified cotton being grown these days. The old cotton lasted longer (I have had Levis that are at least twenty years old), so the powers that be decided to grow a cotton that, while more resistant to boll weevils, cannot hold up against everyday wear and tear.

  7. @5: Nowadays the kids call that “distressed” or “destructed.”

    @6: Propriety prevents one from hazarding a guess.

    @7: I bet somewhere there’s a progressive Utopian with no sense of humor thinking, “hey we should make jeans out of HEMP!”

    @8: Propriety does not prevent RG, apparently!

  8. First of all, Gap makes cheap stuff…twice they’ve been exposed for using sweatshop labor.

    And secondly, word is your manliness possibly exceeds JC Christian’s. Perhaps that is a contributing factor.

    Also the Gap sucks.

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